In the Doctor's Arms Page 16

  “It was one of the best weeks of my life. My only complaint is that it went by too fast. I’d love to take another run at those grayling. Man, that was fun. I’d stay longer if I could swing it, but I’ve got a...a really important thing I’ve got to get back for. You’re lucky that you get to call this place home.”

  “I know, extremely lucky. You’re welcome again anytime.”

  Flynn wanted to roll his eyes. Instead, he slipped an arm around Iris’s waist and gave her a little sideways hug.

  Sebastien grinned. “Only a few more weeks and we’ll get to see each other every day. I love how we’ve hit it off. I’m so stoked to have you on board.”

  “I’m excited about it, too.”

  Sebastien looked at Flynn and said, “It’s great that you’ll be joining Iris in DC for the gala. I look forward to introducing you guys to some very cool people.”

  “Thanks for the invitation. Should be fun,” Flynn remarked.

  “Iris tells me you’re still doing your residency—how’s that going to work out? The long-distance thing? That can be hard on a relationship.”

  “We’re not worried about that. I only have another year or so.” That was fudging slightly, he thought, but whatever. “In the meantime, we’re hoping to accumulate enough air miles that we can take the most incredible honeymoon ever.”

  “Oh.” Sebastien’s eyebrows went up. “So, you guys are engaged?”

  “Um,” Iris answered.

  Oops. “Yes,” Flynn said.

  “Congratulations! Where’s the honeymoon going to be?” Sebastien asked.

  “Iceland,” Flynn answered.

  “Bora Bora,” Iris said at the same time.

  Flynn chuckled. “Actually, we haven’t completely decided yet if it will be Iceland, Bora Bora, New Caledonia or Seychelles.”

  “Huh. That’s kind of an odd yet very specific assortment.”

  “Not really. Those are the four places in the world outside of Antarctica where there are no mosquitoes.”

  Iris was gaping at him, so he took the opportunity to brush a quick kiss across her lips. Then he looked back at Sebastien and said, “You’d never know it, but Iris hates mosquitoes.”

  * * *

  A SPRAINED WRIST, a blistered heel, chapped lips, two chafed shoulders, an aching back and one scabbed-over mosquito bite later, and a nice combination of accomplishment and relief settled into Iris. She’d done it.

  With the help of Flynn and her family, she’d not only survived, but she’d also proven that she could “Alaska” with the best of them. Okay, maybe not the best, but she wasn’t the worst, either. She was officially exhausted. Thankfully, fatigue seemed to be afflicting most of the crowd and Iris was glad when the evening wound down early.

  “So, how are you feeling?” Flynn asked as he drove her home. “Like you conquered the world?”

  “Ask me again after I sleep for twelve hours straight. In my bed.”

  Flynn laughed, happy that she could joke about the experience. “You should be really proud of yourself.”

  “I am. I’ll admit it. But I know I never could have pulled it off without you and Hazel and Seth. Thank you again, especially for getting me through my meltdown.”

  “You’re welcome. But you deserve the credit. You’re the one who persevered. My part wasn’t much of a hardship, doing all the things with you that I’ve wanted to do for a long time, anyway.”

  “Yeah, I’m sorry about that.”

  “About what?”

  “When we were kayaking the other day and I said I never had the proper motivation. You seemed upset and I thought about that and I get it. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to do this stuff with you, it was that I was too afraid.”

  “I know. I just wish that I could have been the one to make you want to conquer that fear.”

  “Well, you might not have been the one to make me want to, but you were instrumental in helping me do it. And in keeping me from being completely miserable.”

  “Are you admitting it was fun?”

  “Parts of it,” she conceded.

  Flynn slid her a smile. “Good.”

  “Why did you tell Sebastien that we’re engaged?”

  “Honestly? I feel like he’s less likely to try asking you out if he thinks we’re engaged.”

  “Wait, you’re jealous of Sebastien? He’s my boss.”

  “No... Of course not—I don’t do jealousy.”

  She chuckled. “You don’t do jealousy? Is it that easy? Must be so nice to have everything work out for you all the time,” Iris said wryly.

  “Not everything,” Flynn countered, thinking about how things were playing out with him and Iris. “But he’s into you, Iris.”

  She sputtered out a laugh. “Flynn, trust me on this one. Sebastien is not into me. But, oh, my gosh...” Peering at him carefully, she added, “Hazel was right.”

  “About what?”

  “About a whole list of things actually, but what I’m referring to is that she told me you were deliberately trying to keep Sebastien away from me—is that true?”

  “No. Maybe,” he conceded. “A little.”

  “I can’t help it, I love the idea that you’re jealous, as long as it’s only a little. I promise, you have nothing to worry about where Sebastien is concerned. You’re all I want.”

  The words made his heart soar even as reality flooded in to deflate the sensation. “I know, I mean I trust you. It’s not him, exactly...”

  “Then spill it, what’s the problem?”

  When he’d kissed her, he’d assured her that they could work things out. But the truth was that he hadn’t thought it through. Not completely, and Sebastien had put his finger right on the four-thousand-mile-wide wound. Painfully. The long-distance relationship wasn’t even the issue so much as their long-term status. They could survive the distance for a while, but then what?

  Because, despite Iris conquering the last week, nothing fundamental had changed regarding her feelings about Alaska; she wasn’t going to live in Rankins and he wasn’t going to move to Washington, DC.

  It was a bitter pill to swallow but Flynn was beginning to see that Ally and Iris were right—he was used to things going his way. Selfishly, he’d wanted her, and he’d wanted her to admit that she returned his feelings. Stupidly, he’d thought that would be enough. They’d declare their love and then live happily-ever-after here in Rankins.

  But now that her leaving was bearing down on them, he didn’t have any idea how they were going to be able to do this. But he couldn’t bring himself to tell her. Not now. Not when they’d finally gotten here, to this point. He had no idea what they were going to do.

  As if to underscore his thoughts, she leaned forward and took his hand. “What is it?”

  “Okay,” he said, and turned on his most rakish grin. He held up his finger and thumb about an inch apart. “I’ll admit to maybe this much jealousy.”

  * * *

  “YOU FEEL LIKE COMPANY?”

  Flynn hadn’t heard his grandfather coming up the stairs to his deck, but he was glad to see him. “Hey.” He waved him over. “Yeah, sure.”

  Years earlier, when Flynn was in high school, he and Doc had converted the space above the garage into a mother-in-law apartment, which his grandparents then used as guest quarters. Flynn secretly suspected that they’d been anticipating the day that Flynn would move to Rankins permanently and need the affordable apartment.

  He’d finished his shift at the hospital but was too keyed up to sleep. It happened sometimes, and when it did he’d come home, sit outside on this deck, gaze out at the view and try not to think about anything much at all. Until Iris had returned to town. Since then, he’d spent most of his free time thinking about her, dreaming about the life they could make here together. How was he going to tell her that he didn’t have it a
ll figured out?

  His grandfather handed him a frosty cold bottle of beer and lowered himself into the chair next to Flynn’s. Flynn opened the bottle and took a long drink. Doc did the same. A cow moose and her calf emerged from the edge of the brush and began munching on a willow tree.

  “How was the backpacking trip?”

  That brought a trace of a smile. Despite her “motivation,” Flynn was proud of Iris for pulling it off. She’d overcome some serious obstacles.

  “Successful,” he said.

  “Good news.”

  “Thanks again for the advice. You and Caleb should consider writing an advice column or a blog or have a radio show.”

  Doc grinned. “Glad we could help. We’d be great on a radio show, wouldn’t we? But, I gotta say, you look kinda miserable for a man in love.”

  “I may have jumped the gun a little.”

  “Let me guess, you’re sitting up here and stewing about how you kids are going to manage a long-distance relationship?”

  Shrewd, his grandfather was. “Pretty much.” He added a slow nod and decided to confess. “When she first moved back, I thought if I could confirm that she had feelings for me then I could convince her to stay. I thought it would be easy if she cared about me even a fraction as much as I do about her. I was confident that she didn’t really hate Rankins as much as she thought she did. I thought, you know, that love would prevail.” He added a shake of his head.

  “And now?”

  “I’ve discovered that there’s a lot more to her dislike of this place than I realized.” He paused to watch the moose for a moment. “It’s difficult because the same way this place embodies my best memories, it exemplifies her worst. And I get it, it’s easier to avoid the past than face it.” Basically, what he was doing with Sonya. “I can’t ask her to stay here.”

  “I see.”

  “And I can’t leave.”

  Doc peered at him like he was thinking this over. “Can’t or won’t?”

  “As you well know, I still have over a year of my residency to complete and then I’m buying your medical practice.”

  Expression set to pondering, Doc leaned back in his seat. “You know, your dad and me, we’ve never had a strong father-son relationship. He always wanted... Heck, I still don’t know what he wants. I have no idea how your grandmother and I could have raised such a selfish individual.”

  Flynn laughed. He didn’t know, either. His parents had been perfect for each other in that sense.

  “But you’re a good man, Flynn. Better than your grandmother and I ever hoped you’d be. I’d like to think I had something to do with that.”

  Flynn reached over and gripped his grandfather’s hand. “You had everything to do with that—you and Gram, both. I don’t know where I’d be right now if I hadn’t had you guys to turn to.”

  “My point is, I’m so grateful for the time we’ve had together.”

  “Me, too.”

  “All I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy. Iris makes you happy, Flynn. Just the idea that you’ve found a love that’s anything like what I had with your gram makes me even happier than watching you follow in my footsteps.”

  “She does, and I want to make her happy, too.”

  “But?”

  “But I don’t know if it’s possible to have everything we want in life. I think I was too confident, maybe a little selfish. I didn’t stop to consider the logistics before I...told her how I felt.”

  “That’s not an easy thing to admit.”

  “It’s even harder to deal with.”

  “There’s something your grandmother used to say that seems fitting in this situation. She used to tell me, ‘Teddy, I would be happy in a garbage dump if that’s where I had to live to be with you.’ And if you could have seen the apartment we lived in during medical school, you’d know it was true.”

  Flynn laughed and scratched at the bottle’s paper label with his thumbnail.

  “You know we settled here because she fell in love with it?”

  “I did not know that.” Flynn had never thought to ask what had brought his grandparents to Alaska.

  “I wanted to live in Colorado, where our folks were. We came up here one summer on vacation with some friends and she didn’t want to leave. It was important for your gram that we have our own life.”

  “Do you regret it? Did you ever wish you would have stayed in Colorado?”

  “Not for one minute. I’ve never been one of those people who believes that where a person lives has all that much bearing on their contentment.”

  Flynn thought about that. “I see what you mean. I’ve spent my entire life trying to get home, here to Rankins, but when it comes down to it, that was due largely to the fact that you guys were here. This is where I’ve always seen myself.”

  Doc watched the moose. “However, in Iris’s case, I can see where that would be different.”

  “Me, too. That’s why I can’t ask her to stay.”

  “So don’t.”

  Flynn was tired, so it took a bit for Doc’s words to register. “What are you saying here, Doc?”

  “I’m saying there are a lot of opportunities for a young doctor in Washington, DC. You have options, Flynn, you just haven’t taken the time to explore them.”

  “But...” He felt an outpouring of love for his grandfather so strong it made his eyes burn. “What about me buying your practice?”

  “The practice is still valuable. You’re not the only doctor to want a practice in small-town Alaska.”

  Flynn nodded. That was true. But there was a deeper issue, the one he’d spent his entire life struggling with after a lonely childhood of feeling like a drifter. It wasn’t easy to admit that he liked belonging somewhere, feeling needed, being liked and, yes, being loved. The first three he got from this town and the latter was sitting beside him. Although, Iris loved him, too. Even if they hadn’t exchanged the words yet, he knew it to be true.

  “You’re the only family I have. I don’t want to leave you. I don’t want to leave Rankins. And since I’m being honest here, there’s a part of me that can’t understand Iris not wanting to stay here. She’s got this big, amazing family who will do anything for her. How can she want to leave them? Sure, she’s different from them in a lot of ways, but they don’t care.”

  “But she does. Just as you want to be a part of the crowd, Iris wants to stand out from the crowd. She needs to believe that all those ways that she’s different aren’t bad. It’s tough to do in a family like hers.”

  Doc was right. Even though she’d proven to herself, and to her family, that she could do this Alaska thing, the bottom line was that she didn’t want to. Somehow, Flynn needed to accept the fact that she wasn’t going to change her mind.

  * * *

  “KEEP IT STEADY AND...there we go. Nice. You’re a natural with that yoke, Iris.”

  “Cricket, I would love to smile at you right now, but I can’t tear my eyes away. Am I really doing this?” A rush of adrenaline blasted through Iris’s bloodstream and left her tingling all over. The thrill of being in complete control of something so powerful was heady.

  “You’re really doing it. I’ve seen pilots with hundreds of hours of experience who don’t have your gentle touch.”

  “Then there’s the fact that I have the best instructor.” This time she managed to toss him a quick grin. Brotherly-type pride danced in his luminous green eyes.

  His compliment meant a lot to her for two reasons. One, Cricket wouldn’t give it if he didn’t mean it, and two, she was flying a real airplane! Okay, so she was flying it with Cricket, but that didn’t matter. Her solo flight would come soon enough.

  Iris relaxed into the movements she’d memorized and practiced and memorized some more. Gradually, the beauty of their surroundings sank into her—the cerulean blue of the sky, velvety g
reen mountains rising from the crystalline water of the coast.

  “It’s wild how different piloting a plane is than being a passenger.” Growing up in small-town Alaska and having an older brother for a pilot, she’d been no stranger to flying in small aircraft. But this—this was exhilarating.

  “It is,” Cricket agreed.

  With a slow, steady push of her foot on the rudder, she banked the aircraft gently to the right. The plane swung around, then she adjusted the yoke and brought the nose down gently. The power at her fingertips and the picturesque view combined to steal her breath.

  After a moment she glanced at Cricket again, and asked, “Does it ever get old?”

  “Not for me.”

  For the first time in her life Iris thought she might understand her thrill-seeking family a little better. Floating among the scattered clouds, and the majestic mountains that appeared to rise from the sea. Nestled along the shoreline of the bay, the tiny town of Rankins appeared quaint and beautiful. Rooftops glowed in the sunlight, making it easy to spot the Cozy Caribou, with its characteristic red roof. She could imagine people walking along the streets. The riverfront park adjacent to the bay looked inviting with its verdant patches of green grass, picnic tables, paved pathways and state-of-the-art play structures.

  Viewing her hometown from the air on a pristine day like today, she could almost forget the hurt she’d endured at its hands.

  Almost. After a while, Iris relinquished control and Cricket landed the plane. They sat there for a few seconds in silence and she could feel Cricket’s gaze on her. She belted out a joyous laugh and beamed at him. “I love it! Cricket, thank you! I’m... Wow. This flying thing is incredible!” Kayleen was right—she did belong here. They’d been in touch, and Iris couldn’t wait to email and tell her.

  “It is and I knew you’d be great at it.” Peering at something out the window, he said, “Uh-oh.”

  “Uh-oh? What ‘uh-oh’? Is something wrong?”

  “Looks like we’ve got an audience. Your brother is here.”

  “Oh, boy...” Iris winced. “I guess this is one way to tell him, huh?”